Teacher : A se Apple, aur batao A se?
Student : A se na mujhe tum dekho seene se laga lunga.
एक चिड़ियाघर में एक तोते के पिंजड़े के बाहर लिखा था ---
"इंग्लिश, हिंदी और भोजपुरी बोलने वाला तोता".
एक आदमी ने इस बात को टेस्ट करने के लिए तोते से पहले इंग्लिश में पूछा ---- हू आर यू ?
तोता -- आई ऍम पैरेट।
आदमी (हिंदी में) -- तुम कौन हो?
तोता -- मैं एक तोता हूँ।
आदमी (इस बार भोजपुरी में)-- तु के हय ?
तोता -- तोर बाप सरऊ... एकई बतीया चार बेरी पुछत हउवे सारे , पटक के लतिया देब........
A man received message from his neighbour.
"Sorry sir I am using your wife.
I am using day and night.
I am using when u r not present at home.
In fact I am using more than you are using.
I confess this because now I feel very much guilt.
Hope you will accept my sincere apologies."
Man went home and had a big fight with his wife.
Few minutes later he received another massage.
"Sorry Sir, spelling / auto correct mistake ...
it's not wife but WIFI...
Son:"Daddy, I fell in love & want to date this awesome girl!"
Father: "That's great son. Who is she?"
Son: "It's Sandra, the neighbor's daughter"
father: "Ohhh I wish you hadn't said that.
I have to tell u something son, but you must promise not to tell your mother.
Sandra is actually your sister."
The boy is naturally bummed out,
but a couple of months later
Son: "Daddy, I fell in love again n she is even hotter!"
Father: "That's great son. Who is she?"
Son: "It's Angela, the other neighbor's daughter."
Father: "Ohhhh I wish you hadn't said that.
Angela is also your sister."
This went on couple of times and the son was so mad,
he went straight to his mother crying.
Son: "Mum I am so mad at dad! I fell in love with six girls but I
can't date any of them because dad is their father!"
The mother hugs him affectionately and says:
"My love, you can date whoever you want.
Dont listen to him He isn't your father." :P
Dad Fainted :D:D
Girl:mom aaj 1 ladke ne mere gal pe kiss kiya
Mom:tune usko chata mara ya nhi
Girl:mujhe achanak Gandhi ji yaad aa gaye aur maine dusra gaal bhi aage kar diya. :P :D ;)
EK baar ek aadmi Bike pe sawar ho kar border paar kar raha tha aur uski pith pe ek bag tha..
Border pe tainat sipahi ne usse puchha k is bag me kya hai.. ??
Addmi:"iss bag me mitti hai..
Sipahi ne thik se pura bag check kiya par usko mitti k siwa kuchh na mila... usne us bike sawar ko jane diya..
fir kuchh dino bad wo bike sawar fir se aaya aur fir se uske paas wohi bag tha
Sipahi ne fir check kiya par iss baar bhi mitti ke siwa kuchh na mila
iss tarah ye silsila 2 saal tak chalta raha..
2 saal me wo bike sawar bahut ameer ban gaya,,,
ek din ek hotel me wo sipahi us bike sawar se mila aur pucha ki: "Mujhe doubt hai ki tum kuchh na kuhch jaroor churate ho, mujhe bata do me kisi se bhi nahi kahuga
Bike sawar: "mai to bike churata tha :P
Japan ne chor ( thief ) pakadne ki
machine banai..
They took it to different countries
for a test. . .
...
In USA, 30 mins me 10 chor pakad
liye ;
In UK, in 30 mins me 20 chor
pakad liye;
In china , 10 mins me 30 chor
pakad liye;;
In Sri Lanka , 7 mins me 40 chor
pakad liye;
Last me us machine ko INDIA
laye . .
5 min me MACHINE hi chori ho
gai !!!! :P :D
?1 Hotel me naye Shaadi Shuda couple ke liye notice likha tha:
.
.
.
..
Khidki par parde daal kar rakhe,
Aapka Pyaar andha ho sakta hai,
Magar hamara staff nahi :P:D
Teacher:
"Beta Nisaar tum kaisay paida hue?"
.
.
Nisaar :
.
.
.
.
.
" Jawani Jan-e-man.,
Haseen dil-ruba.,
Milay 2 dil jawan.,
Nisar ho gaya" :D