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Jokes Sms and Jokes Quotes

Laughter is the best medicine and Jokes sms are the prescription.

A 50 year old lady, who suddenly started learning how to swim instead of her usual routine work of going to a temple !!!!

Everyone was curious and asked her: "why the change in your interest to swimming now a days?"

The lady, with a look of helplessness replied: "Whenever my son and daughter-in-law quarrel each other She ( Daughter-in-law) always asks my son : - "If your mom and I fall in water, whom will you save first?"

And because I do not want to put my son in a difficult position, so I am learning how to swim!"

A few days later husband and wife were quarrelling again, and the daughter-in-law unreasonably asked: " now tell me! If your mom and I fall in water, whom will you save first?"

Husband replied:
"I don't have to get down in the water, my mom knows how to swim, she will save you."

Wife refused to relent: "No, you have to jump in the water, and have to save one of us"

Husband replied: "Then you will surely die.... because I don't know how to swim .... and my mom will definitely save me first." :D :D


Definition of a happy couple:

He Does what She wants
And
She does what She wants... =P ;->


Ek bar pappu bank me gaya
.
.
.
Kamino mere ko A/C kholna hai.. :p

.
Lady:- Tameez se baat kijiye,

.
Pappu : Tameez ki maa ki ankh. :O
Account kon kholega wo bata,

.
Lady manager ko complaint karne
gayi.

.
Manager:- kyu batameezi kar rahe ho, :@

Pappu: Batameezi ki maa ki ankh,
Boss D.K., meri 100 crore ki lotery lagi hai,
battao account kaun kholega, :D
.

.

.
Manager: arrey sir aap bhi kaha is
chudel se baat kar rahe ho,
Mai yaha kya aisi tesi krwane
betha hun, plzz comesir .. PLzz :P =D :D :D

Paisa bolta hai boss :D

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बीवी मंदिर गयी और मन्नत का धागा बाँधने के लिए हाथ उठाये.

फिर कुछ सोच कर मन्नत का धागा बांधे बिना ही हाथ नीचे कर लिये।

पति: ये क्या ? मन्नत नही मॉंगी ?

पत्नी: माँगने ही लगी थी कि ईश्वर आपकी तमाम मुश्किलें दूर कर दे...

फिर सोचा कहीं मैं ही न निपट जाऊँ!


Bar में दो लोग दारू पी रहे थे।
एक जो पूरा टून्न हो गया था, बोला- यार तेरी माँ बहुत सुंदर है, मुझे वो बहुत अच्छी लगती है। मरता हूँ उस पर। इस उम्र में भी एकदम हीरोइन दिखती है।

सन्नाटा...

लोग सोचने लगे अब लफड़ा होगा।
दूसरा उठा और बोला -
घर चलो, आपको दारु चढ़ गई है,"पापा".


PATNI :-Agar mai kho gayi to tum kya kroge

SANTA :- Dhooniwale Baba k pas jaunga

PATNI :-Tum kitne ache ho
kya kahoge unse?

Santa :- Kahunga Baba apki kripa ho gayi :-)

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बेटा: आज भी लौकी की सब्जी? मै होटल जा रहा हूँ खाना खाने...
बाप : मेरे जूते कहा हैं? ला तो जरा...
.
बेटा: पापा मै तो मजाक कर रहा था.
वैसे भी लौकी की सब्जी स्वास्थ्य के लिए लाभदायक होती है.
.
बाप: हरामखोर ज्यादा ज्ञान मत झाड़! जूते ला चुपचाप, मै भी तेरे साथ चलूंगा


*Pakistan*
Guy1: wo dekh plane se kuch gir raha
Guy2: food packets honge..
Guy1: bhaag saale ab Obama nahi Trump hai


[Job interview]
HR: Tell me about yourself?
Girl: You'll never understand what a girl feels.

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